Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought that I would have blood on my hands today. The incident happened just in the matter of a few seconds.Now, I am about 3kms away from the scene of that unavoidable calamity. Aimless, like a vagabond, I wandered in the green canopy that surrounded me. I felt fear, confusion and anger. The dry leaves that crackled under my heavy feet added to the mixed emotions that ran circles in my mind.
Will they come in search of me? Warm blood trickled like rivulets alongside my ears. I turned back once to see if anyone was in pursuit. I could feel my lower lips palpitate uncontrollably in anger. There was no one following me but the possibility did exist. Before that happens, I need to get away as far as possible.
I swear, I did not do it wantonly. Only thing I don’t understand is why they kept piling those barricades across the paths that were meant to be used. This has been happening for the past few months. Quite a few times I had returned back, confused that I had taken a wrong route. But this day, since she had consented to accompany me, I decided to get across the barricade. By exploring new places, I felt my relationship with her would improve. In hindsight, this desire might have a contributed to the incident that happened a little while ago.
In the vicinity we stay, there were some villages, some developed areas,which we sometimes visit during our search for food. We used to go around in large numbers. The inhabitants, sensing our unquestioned strength and fearless demeanor use to run helter-skelter to safety the moment they see us. Till we have our fill, though locals used to shout at us from a safe distance, they never dared to attack us. I could never understand their behavior. Though we knew for sure that they could not harm us, maybe an inherent fear inside made us only go for feeding only during the night time. Hours before the break of dawn, we would retreat back to our shelters.
Our family elders always used to say that, in the past, the villages and sub- urban lands were places where our forefathers used to live. But it seems they were cruelly driven off from their rightful lands and forced to go deeper into the forests. It was big news to me, since my shelter has always remained the same ever since I was born. I realized now, that after the incident that happened today, even our stay here seemed like a question mark. The rain that had stopped yesterday night, started again now. It hit me that once this rains stop, they would come in search of me.
I had sent her home through another path that we knew. Without my presence, I knew she might be a little scared. Even after the big calamity that happened she wanted to stay with me. But I felt that her presence would not help, especially in this confused state. In fact, I had to rebuke her a bit rudely to make her go back. Tears on her face though seemed more painful for me to handle than my present fate.
My legs seems just that heavy and weary and I felt like resting for sometime. Finding a place that can hide me properly in dense outgrowths, I sat to get back my strength. My palpitated, heavy breathless state seemed to settle down now. I wiped traces of blood that were on my feet. The incident that happened just a few hours seemed to cast light shadows on the back of my mind.
While crossing the man-made barricade with her, I could not foresee the forthcoming events. I was more engrossed in the heady feeling of being with her, especially when our bodies touched each other, when walking close to each other.
That day, traffic on the roads were a little heavy, maybe due to the rain. Normally, the traffic would be less and the road calm. The high beams from the vehicles, the incessant horns blaring seemed to make her disconcerted. She wanted to cross the road quickly. Both of us increased our pace. As we tried to weave trough the traffic, people put their heads out of their windows hooting and hollering in impatience. She tried to get close to me as much as possible.
Suddenly, while we are halfway through to crossing the road, one vehicle, maybe blinded by the rain, lost control and came to a screeching stop near us. It only scared her more and she tried to get behind me for protection. I felt my anger rising against that unfeeling driver, yet my only aim was to get out of that place as fast as possible.
To get away from the maddening traffic and the strange sounds of that place and reach the safety of the fields was my primary objective. Even though I had not gone on that path before, I knew that it was close to our regular feeding places. It was a paradox that the impending dark and the chilly weather seemed to add more beauty to our companionship. Talking to her all the time to make sure she does not feel any fear, I made my way to the houses on the outskirts to get to the fields. Even now, I vaguely heard the hooting of the insensitive people in the vehicles in the background. There was not much activity in the vicinity of the houses. Not one soul, except for one lady who was out with her dog, the empty land in front of the houses there serving as a open toilet for the dog. The moment i entered the outskirts, I noticed both of them. It was my intention to somehow find a way to avoid them on the way to my destination.
The dog though, spotted us and started barking. The lady herself would have expected our presence at that untimely hour. Seized by fright, the woman waved her umbrella at me and started yelling for help. My companion, already frightened by the road crossing moved behind my back. To assuage her fears, I took a couple of steps forward and advertised my discomfort. The dog, growling and barking incessantly added to the confusion. The lady folded the umbrella and threw it at me. I just pushed her away. She fell a few feet away. The dog advanced towards me. The lady got up, shouted more for help and tried to move forward. Whether she wanted to save her dog or try to hurt me, it was something I could not comprehend. She lost her footing in the slippery mud due to the rain and fell,almost under my feet. Just for a solitary instant as I thought of pushing the dog and the lady away, my feet dithering in indecision. I drove the dog away for a short distance and turned back. The lady seemed to lie still. I got close to her and tried to move her inert form. It seemed like she had passed away. Damp blood beneath her head made the red clay seem even more darker. Did I step on her while I went for the dog?
I tried to shake her again and again. Unmoved. I stepped back a little. Saw my companion sheltering behind a tree. I am not sure if she understood what happened here. I was lost and did not know what to do. Confusion reigned. Made another effort to move that collapsed body.
The lady’s screams and the dog’s barks made the people come out of their houses. They started coming at us shouting. Crackers were burst. Fire torches made of wood, doused in kerosene and lit made their appearance. It would not be good for me to stay there for long. Taking my love with me, I started to run to the safety of the dense forests close by. More firecrackers were thrown at us.
The rain increased, the falling rain on the leaves shook me out of my reverie. I got up slowly. Almost by second nature, I broke a shoot of leaves close by using my trunk and fed myself. The dew tinged leaves helped sooth my throat.
I looked back once. There was no one following me. I started walking towards the denser regions of the forest. Why did I have to take a life? I could feel heaving thoughts weigh down the pace of my measured walk.
Whatever be, it was my destiny to get back to my love as fast as possible.
This narrative on human-animal conflict by the author was inspired by a recent incident that happened a stone’s throw from his house. This is a translation by Prakash Rangarajan of the original article in Tamil. You can check out the original tamil version here.
We wish too that it was just a bad dream. But, we know too that it was an accident waiting to happen. Increased conflict between animals and humans has slowly becoming an universal problem. What do you think would be an ideal working solution to this pressing issue? What is the best way forward? Do chip in with your thoughts.